Is Tom Milde - single-volume poet and freelance print hack - about to get his big break? Waking up in the wrong apartment, and hotly pursued for his life and back rent through the streets of New York, he ends up boarding a plane to Virginia for PLC* TV as the man-on-the-spot reporting the latest American gun massacre. But before he can face the cameras and claim his position in the relentless, hungry world of the News Pigs, Milde must battle a tiny homicidal bandito, vengeance-seeking frat boys, a Tasering, several dunkings and Samson Agonistes, iconic correspondent for the opposing network. Oh, and his own mum. * The Plucky Little Country, pop. 3.8 million: Milde's motherland: social laboratory and cheese larder (particularly Gouda); widely admired for the nobility and humility of her inhabitants, her beautiful weather, and her dominance in the sport of curling.