Meet Ossie. He's got problems. His father is dead, his mother thinks All Men Are Bastards, and his sister is an alien. And in six months, he will have to learn the following life skills: How to impress a psychologist wearing a bow tie How to make a relief teacher cry How to concentrate on cricket when corellas are taking over the world How to survive a day at school while a cold sore is taking over your face How to cope when you suddenly turn into a giant How to kiss a girl who can't keep still He's also got to learn the most important lesson of all...Life is freaky...