Ex-Mormon writer Johnny Townsend can't leave the Church behind. But it turns out, that's a good thing. With almost five decades in the Mormon and ex-Mormon communities, Townsend knows its people well. In this collection of short stories, we see a missionary cope with the startling discovery that his companion has been translated off the face of the Earth. In the Celestial Kingdom, an aspiring god learns there is more to the training program than he ever thought possible. A repentant call girl discovers that her congregation won't allow her to forget her past. A gay ex-Mormon realizes gay marriage isn't all it's cracked up to be. A schizophrenic Single Adult leads a secret life no one in her congregation suspects. A man leaving the Church loses his family--and everything else he's ever loved. A lonely woman gives birth to a child fathered by one of the Three Nephites. In these stories, we learn the many secrets faithful Mormons reveal only to their most trusted bishops.