Saint Nicholas Archeologists discover the treasure cave of the ancient Matigwas near Aguascalientes Mexico. Artic weather, revolution, desperados, cannibals, volcanic eruption, kidnappers, and Colonel Hugo Chavis inconvenience and complicate the lives of PI Derek Strong, lawyer Sandra Lerner, and friends. They recover the body of Hugo Chavez behind enemy lines and go after the Matigwa gold. Quetzacoatl was frightenly tall with a high plumed headdress, a cape of painted feathers, and turquoise and gold earrings. His arms were adorned with feathers, and he had talons for hands. He wore a skirt of gold and silver. His legs were scaled like a serpent, and he had talons for feet. His cheeks and midriff were painted gold, and a sliver line ran from his forehead down through the center of his nose, chin, chest, navel, and abdomen, he raised his feathered spear aloft and readied to strike. Dirk had incontinence, and Peter ran passed him toward daylight forgetting the rope. A bulb flashed, and Dirk jerked backward landing on his butt and flipping over on his knees before he could recover his feet and follow Peter out the cave. Seeking first aid for a scraped butt and knees, Dirk felt little solace in being the first to photograph Quetzacoatl, the feathered serpent god of the Toltecs, Aztecs, and Mayas. WARNING: Violence, profanity, and erotic sex. OKAY FOR DUMMIES.