The authors describe how they approach each individual on the autistic spectrum with no preconceived notions about who they are or what is "right" for them. The typical mind set of professionals is that we have the answers, tools and science to dictate what a child in school or adult are supposed to do. We introduce the idea that the person with autism has all the answers to what they need to regulate more successfully throughout their day and life. Our approach is to understand the individual on the spectrum of autism from within taking cues from their rituals, movements, verbal expression and passions. The most successful school setting is one that does not pre-determine a curriculum, but co-creates, with the child on the spectrum and their families, an educational program that includes the whole personality of the child, not just their behaviors. "If you focus on the autism, you can't see the person".