There is nothing a twenty-one-year-old man at his first job in New York City needs more than a good mentor, although few of them find one. But author Matthew Phillips found the wild, impetuous, and knowledgeable Marylou Stern. The years Matt spent with Marylou were filled with parties, sex, excess, frivolity, live cows, kidnapped Jewish jewelers, and games that stretch the imagination. In this memoir, Phillips shares his story of how Marylou, a former model, dancer, and actress, transformed him from an eager, fresh-faced college grad into a sidelines player in chic New York society. Over the course of three years, Marylou taught Matt about New York City, high society, the difference between class and low class, how to make a genuine egg cream, how to milk a cow, why wanton sex is good for your health, why listening is more important than talking, that Sara Lee Vanilla Layer Cakes are the best reward, and that you must never put up with thieves. In Everything but Snakes, Phillips narrates how Marylou's undying sense of celebration kept him going and gave him a floor beneath his feet and, along the way, an upside-down roller-coaster ride.