For Ethan Caldwell, a victim of an abusive childhood, fear is a badge he has worn sewn over his heart for all of his life. Afraid of happiness, joy, comfort, friendship, and most of all love, Ethan is slowly realizing that each day is becoming more difficult than the last. Even though Ethan has managed to walk away from years of physical abuse, the emotional scars remain. He cannot shake the memories that haunt him and as he attempts to drown his traumatic recollections in half-emptied bottles of rum, the only thing that keeps him from unraveling completely is his music. Virtually alone, he only wants to play out the remaining moments of his life unnoticed until it's his turn to fold. Fraught with desperation and with only a modicum of hope, Ethan is about to make a deal with the devil and bid farewell to a past that has shrouded any possibility of redemption. As he begins a new chapter in his life, he must face his deepest fears in order to find the only path to true salvation and love. AUTHOR BIO M.C. Joudrey was born in Sydney, Nova Scotia on the isle of Cape Breton. He is an avid collector of literature, music, and art in all its forms. Still, hope is his most valued possession. He currently resides in Toronto with his wife. This is his first novel.