The names Lewton. I'm a private investigator. I don't know where the idea came from, I was just thinking one night that it would be really cool to have an office with my name on the door and a sturdy desk for sexy broads to lean across. Trouble is, where ever there are sexy broads theres trouble, and the dame I'm working for wrote the book on trouble, and the sequel too.

Her name's Carlotta, and between her, the psychotic Dwarf who's following me and this walking mountain with the brain of a pomegranate who calls himself malachite, I'm beginning to wonder if the Discworld's first Private I might be about to become the Discworld's last Private I too.