Selected stories from Beyond Alpha and Omega 2009 by Lester N. Pope Hold Your Nose for America ...in which the existence of the country depends on every citizen producing his quota of garbage! A Quality Education ...in which a university must fight to keep its last student or close its doors forever. In His Image ...in which robot scientists of the future discover evidence of life before "automates" existed. Quit Honkin' ...in which an "ornery" cow reeks havoc in a corn field and in the mind of her owner. No Canned Diet for Me ...in which a vampire decides to flee his nagging wife (by simply oversleeping) but he escapes into the worst possible world for his kind. ...plus 14 more excursions into wonder!